I love my guy. I think he’s kind of a unicorn. Is that not as flattering for a guy? Then maybe a sphinx. Not every man will be like him, but he’s just-right for me.
Part of why I thought that I’d never get married is because I figured at 29, there were few godly men left. The ones who were tended to go for younger women. Hopefully this will encourage non-college-aged single ladies everywhere (just kidding…all four of you. I’m realistic) that good men exist and that the version you need may be out there and is worth waiting for. If not, know that God still has big dreams for your life, and I still want to support you in those. I learned it…how He doesn’t love us any less just because our life plan looks different, as hard as that can be to swallow.
So alas, the list of some of the (surprisingly) beautiful things about dating a godly man:
-A godly man will usually assume risk. He will see it as his job to be open to rejection. He will ask you out clearly. He won’t try to cause you pain, force you or convince you against your will to date Him. Only immature men do that. If it’s of God, He will change hearts without coercion (ask me how I know)
-It will feel natural to thank God for him when you see him or spend time with him
-He will initiate semi-awkward conversations on boundaries before you are close to them and in the right frame of mind. If there is something which you are more particular on than he is, he will honor it.
-He’ll touch and kiss you in a tender way that makes you feel cherished and loved, not lusted after.
-He will not want to be an idol (a priority before God) and does not want you to be an idol.
-The relationship and physical affection will feel pure. You won’t feel guilty after spending alone time together because he sticks to boundaries and wants to honor you as a person. He’s not just chasing a physical high right up until the cliff edge.
-If you bring up something that makes you uncomfortable, he will apologize and change.
-He will not always let you get your way or tell you what you want to hear, but he’ll handle differences gently. He’s mature (and pro-active) in his response to hurt and/or anger (or is actively trying to grow in this area)
-He will be interested in your heart, not just your behavior. He looks beyond the external and wants to know the internal
-It feels natural to have a conversation about God, and not just on Sunday. He will initiate prayer
-He’ll demonstrate a willingness to serve and a proper view of submission…which means, he’ll want you to be all you can be in Christ. He will submit to Christ in making decisions (when it comes time) for the family, but he’ll listen to you and respect your input. He’ll support and encourage your gifts.
-He will be a safe place for your heart. You will feel loved and not judged when you share about how God met you in dark places. He’ll want to help you through the next hard thing.
-His response to your challenges is to listen and pray. And he will pray that he will know how to be supportive and help, not just for “your problems.” He will make you feel like you’re on a team, and he’s in the trenches with you, not burdened by you.
Those are just a few things I love from the spiritual perspective!